Mother Warriors

There is a number of topics I have considered off limits for this blog and kept private. One of those topics has been the fact that my son has some special needs and just never wanted to discuss it in this format. However, I have come across numerous blogs in recent months that echo many of my own stories and concerns, for which I have been very grateful for. One my dearest friends has shared her son's medical struggles since his birth and has been inspiring in so many ways...yes you Rosalee :). This made me realize it wouldn't be such a bad thing to share an occasional tidbit here and there.

I can't possibly share the entire journey as it goes back years, but I will give it to you in a nutshell. Since the age of about two and a half, I noticed something was a bit different about my son, socially. DH and I could never quite put our finger on it, being new parents we had nothing to compare him to. He hit all his milesstones and was very gifted intellectually. Our pediatrician and his preschool teachers assumed he was just immature for his age and would likely catch up to his peers down the line. Well, by the time he was in Kindergarten, his teacher and I KNEW that something was wrong. Thus, we began what would become a three year odyssey to find some answers to our questions.

I can't tell you how many labels were tossed around by the experts, including autism (in my heart I knew that wasn't it). We chased our tail for what seemed like forever. Last summer, my son was diagnosed with Complex Tic Disorder (related to Tourette's), and mild forms of ADD and OCD. Medication was suggested as one course of treatment, but we had to be careful as the wrong one could exacerbate his tics, since that was his primary diagnosis. We opted to wait on the meds for now and look into all of our options first.

This past school year, he has received some special interventions and was also identified as TAG. It has been his most successful year so far and has made tremendous progress. We have been lucky that his teachers have always been wonderful and very nurturing. N is sweet as can be, smart as a whip, and extremely artistic. We try to keep him busy with activities that interest him (same with his sister). This summer he has taken swim lessons and is now in a graphic art class, which he loves. He has his moments still, but is definitely on the right path now. Both my hubby and my brother have battled with ADD, and then at Christmas, I also came to find out that two of his cousins have tic disorders, so they are just genetic quirks within the family. Every family has its thing, this is just one of ours.

Long before I was dealing with any of these issues and was working with teen mothers, I once attended a training seminar on ADD and alternative methods of treatment. I remembered that diet and environment can have an adverse affect on those afflicted with ADD/ADHD. As a teacher, I took the environmental tips seriously but largely ignored the dietary portion of the training. You can imagine how I've kicked my self in the years since. Then last summer I happened to pick up a new author and felt an immediate connection to her and oh how the aha! moments have continued.

Right now, I'm currently reading Mother Warriors: A Nation of Parents Healing Autism Against All Odds by Jenny McCarthy and am very moved by the stories within this book. Now I realize my son doesn't have autism, but I can relate to her story in many other ways. If you have never read any of Jenny's books, I urge you to pick one up. While most people know her from Mtv's Singled Out or from Playboy, I have to say she truly is multidimensional. She began her authorial journey by writing about the underbelly of pregnancy, the stuff no one wants to talk about. She has a no holds bar style that is very raw, very honest, and often very funny. She continued her newfound career by writing about her son's early years and some life transitions she experienced. She had a very light-hearted approach and a very real way of sharing her stories. Her books are easy reads and very relateable.

Then she made the heartwrenching discovery that her son has autism and decided to share this part of her life with the world in her best work, Louder than Words: A Mother's Journey in Healing Autism. This decision was just the beginning of another chapter for her. She has since become the voice of parents everywhere who are fighting and winning the battle against autism. Many in the medical community dismiss her claims that her son has recovered from autism, despite the fact that she has countless examples of his gains. She has pursued what are considered "alternative treatments" in addition to the normal speech and behavioral therapy interventions. She has joined forces with many other parents and doctors who support and have evidence that these alternatives do in fact work. Through diet and and a few other things, their children are healing. Jenny is quick to point out that autism cannot be "cured" at this time, but the symptoms can be treated just like diabetics can't cure their problems, but through proper diet and monitoring, they can live a fruitful life.

Jenny and a doctor she has partnered with have written book together that I will read next called Healing and Preventing Autism Co-written with Dr. Jerry Kartzinel. They state that these dietary changes can also work for other disorders such as ADD. I don't know just yet what I will do as we have never really considered diet as a solution. Not sure how I feel about this for our family needs, but it's worth reading up on at the very least. Just some food for thought (no pun intended).

Why am writing about Jenny McCarthy you might ask? What I found most inspiring about her was how she fought for her son. No one knows a child like their mother. This is not to say that fathers aren't just as important, but a mother carries their child for nine months, gives birth, and is forever attached to them...heart, mind, and soul. Oftentimes, doctors and other professionals can be dismissive of parental concerns and label them as overprotective. While that may be true in some cases, I believe strongly that a mother knows when something just isn't right with their child and must advocate for them as needed.