Swimming With Dolphins: January 2010

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Midwives

Okay, I am in need of some book suggestions. I just finished reading Midwives over the weekend and now am without a novel to escape into. I have a handful of books piling up in the corner of my bedroom, but I can't seem to get into any of them at the moment. Midwives will be a tough act to follow.

In the tradition of all good thrillers, it ends with a bang. It was a little slow at the beginning for me, but I powered through the first couple of chapters and then couldn't put the darn thing down! The basic premise of the book follows Sibyl Danforth, a seasoned midwife who finds herself in an isolated home in northeastern Vermont. When the labor goes terribly wrong, Sibyl is faced with a harrowing decision to perform dangerous C-Section. Tragedy follows and soon Sibyl finds herself on trial and fighting for her very freedom. It is very absorbing and no matter which side you take, you will feel for all involved. It's definitely a must-read! I also would suggest A Midwife's Story as another page turner if you enjoy this sort of subject matter.

This book also sheds an interesting light on home birth. It discusses the pros and cons of hospital vs. home deliveries in narrative form. No one can argue that hospitals provide a safety net that no home can, but nothing can beat the safe haven we find in the comfort of familiar surroundings. Both offer positives and negatives, so having the choice is a blessing. I'm not really partial to one over the other, however I opted to deliver in a hospital.

My firstborn was breech and a high-risk delivery, so a home birth wouldn't have been an option for us anyway. My son was indeed a special delivery that could have gone horribly wrong in less experienced hands. My doctor was truly a blessing. He was old school and highly competent, willing to try a vaginal birth (albeit in an OR) when most doctors would have insisted upon a C-Section. I was feeling no pain thanks to the epidural, so I was pretty loopy. They needed me that way in case things went awry at the last minute. We also were so new and inexperienced, we were very grateful that we had nurses around to help us figure things out. Our hospital room became a sanctuary that we were afraid to leave.

When our daughter was born, we didn't even think about home birth as an option. I guess it just never occurred to us at the time. Her birth was fast and furious from beginning to end, with little drama outside of crazy labor pains. My contractions began at 7:00ish and walked into the hospital at 6cm within the hour. By the time the drugs kicked in at 9cm, they didn't matter much. My daughter burst headlong into the world and hasn't slowed down since. Her birth was a blur, but every bit as wonderful as our son's. Geography just didn't matter to us.

I look back on so many of my early decisions and wonder how I would do things differently now. I honestly don't know, but I don't regret either path we took with both of our children. They are thriving, beautiful children inside and out and well-loved. I'm not sure that how or where we enter this world has much to do with who we become; I like to think it's where we end up that counts.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Wordless Wednesday

BTW...that's ice they're sitting on.

Monday, January 25, 2010

People Change

I am not sure why I go through these dry spells, but I haven't been in much of a blogging mood in recent weeks. Family times were sweet during the holidays, my work life had me feeling under seige. Just as I was getting back into a groove and feeling more at ease than I had in months, the second shoe dropped (so to speak). I don't wish to relive the whole ordeal here as it only causes me stress and sadness, so I will share the nutshell version.

As I have tried to adjust to the many changes that have come down the pike this year from the powers-that-be at my school, I have continued to work on becoming a better teacher as I am far from perfect. Since I am still in my early years as an educator, I still have much to learn and it is a neverending quest for me to do right by my students. That said, I have watched someone, I'll call her T, who was once near and dear to me at work slowly transform into a mere shadow of her former self in her new position of power. We have clashed at times, but always seem to work through our philosophical differences. It has been a bittersweet experience and I have learned some very hard lessons this year. I have resolved to let go of much that has happened, but it has been a challenge on many levels. This person cannot see her own hypocrisies and shortcomings, but liberally points out those flaws in others around her.

Case in point, the librarian and I discussed ordering some historical fiction novels to enrich our English reading program. I ran it by T and she supported this idea. Today, the libarian approached me with a look of grave concern on her face. She said she had briefly discussed the books again with T, only to be told not to order them at this time as she feared they were too old for our students. The libarian shared her excitement with me about winning an eBay auction for these books, but was worried about T's reaction to this. I was puzzled since T had already approved the original decision and these books were found in school libraries everywhere. I accompanied her to confront T about this about-face. Despite my own recent experiences with T, I felt so bad the libarian. When T fearfully shared her news, T accepted this with a smile and said that it was fine. I was glad she did not make a big deal about it and we reminded her about her initial enthusiasm, which she acknowledged. Who knows what was going on in her mind. I never know anymore. I'm learning day by day to just keep my distance and not rock the boat unless absolutely necessary.

I suppose that is one of life's bitter pills that we have to swallow every now and then. It keeps us alert to things that we can become complacent about. People change, things change. Even me. It's a simple fact of life. I just have to face that fact.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Christmas Morn and Eve

Okay, so I am way late in posting a recap of our Christmas Day. As is the case for most of us in the new year, life has been exceptionally busy, hence this blog has suffered a bit as a result. It took a few weeks for me to get back into the groove of working and find that balance. I resolve to write more!

Christmas was a whirlwind to say the least as we hopped from place to place like frogs (a common theme over the holiday break). We spent Christmas Eve in Salem (an hour's drive away) and returned home that same night and finished packing our bags. We woke up next morning fairly early (6:30ish) to get our things ready for our trip later in the day to Bend. We all showered and got dressed. My MIL came over at 8:00 to have breakfast with us. She brought over a danish sweet roll made by a local lady that was large enough to feed all of us (and then some). We had some fruit and egg nog as well. The kids relished these wonderful treats, as did we.

After our bellies were full, we got right to the gifts. The kids got to open their presents from Santa first. I wanted them to take turns opening them (a longheld tradition in my family so we can savor each other's joy and reaction), but I was outvoted by hubby and my MIL, who prefer to just have them open them all at once. We ultimately compromised to let them open them together, while we adults waited patiently to open ours. The kids were excited with each of their gifts. Kirsten received many things that she had asked for, much to her delight. Nicholas had a particularly happy day as he received not one, but two DS games. It will be awhile before he gets another new one. We have a strict rule that he only gets to play his DS once a week and only if he has a good week at school, so it is definitely a major treat for him to play it.

After the kids unwrapped their goodies, we finished opening our own gifts. By the time we were done, it was already mid-morning. We knew we had better get on the road soon if we were to make good time. We said our goodbyes to Grandma J and tried to clean up the room a little. The car was quickly loaded and we were on our way to Bend for my second family Christmas.

Just a quick sidebar...for those not in the know, my mother and natural father divorced when I was just a wee one. Both remarried while I was too young to remember and thus extended family seesaw began. This backstory is too long to rehash here, but I have positive relationships with everyone (though my stepmother is no longer in the picture).

So after a 3 1/2 - 4 hour drive, we arrived in Bend by early afternoon and the festivities were soon underway. My family is too big to name them all here, however many were there. We snacked on a vast array of yummy foods. My Mom knocked herself out to make this delicious spread and was much appreciated by all. My cousin Teresa made her famous pies (she made the cherry one pictured in a previous post). It was so much fun catching up with everyone since we don't get to see each other nearly enough. We hadn't been home to Bend for a visit since July (six months is too long!). We opened presents, gorged ourselves on munchies, joked around, and generally had a grand time. My older brother, Steve, brought his new bride to meet everyone.
She immediately fit right in with the family.

This Christmas was bittersweet, because it would be our last in this house. My parents are nomadic by nature, but they have been in this house since 1994. When they began building it, they finally had the home in the country they had so wanted. It is the only home many of the grandchildren have ever known. They are downsizing and moving closer to town. My Dad is partially retired and my Mom is nearing her retirement. To commemorate this final Christmas, my Mom insisted on measuring every grandchild from the smallest to the tallest, despite their age. Their measurements have been marked on this log wall every Christmas since they moved in. Come hell or high water, that log is coming with them. It was a wonderful family holiday with lots of laughter and smiles. As we all go about our busy lives, it's so nice that we can come together and just be with each other. It gives one such a sense of peace and contentment.

Mom, K, and I went shopping the next morning for a bit. Found some great bargains! We had intended to go ice skating later in the afternoon at an outdoor rink, but it was just barely 10 degrees. We battled one too many colds this season and weren't in the mood to bring any new viruses home. So we opted for some indoor fun, or so we thought. Grandpa P, N, K, and I were gonna see Princess and the Frog, but the theater was bursting with crowds. We couldn't even find a place to park in the nearby businesses. It was just so beyond busy that we decided not to battle the crowds and headed to the park to appease the kids, who were very disappointed. After seeing the frozen pond and all the ducks walking on water (so to speak), they got over it pretty quickly. I snapped away at the beautiful frost that covered everything in sight. The chill kicked in right away, so we sought shelter in an ice cream parlor of all places. We sipped hot cocoa to warm up our insides and checked out an old-fashioned toy store in the downtown district. Then we came back home and vegged for the remainder of the day at my parents' home.

We left after breakfast on Sunday morning. DH had to get back to work. All in all, it was a wonderfully exhausting weekend. The kids and I ended up seeing the movie on Monday, so all was forgiven. :)