Busy as a Bee

I entered the classroom today and got quite the surprise. First, I noticed a different coat hanging on my CT's chair. It turned out to belong to a sub. My CT was out with a family medical emergency, so he left instructions for me to teach all day. The sub was pretty much just there for legal purposes. Needless to say, my heart caught in my throat.

The morning went pretty well actually. There was one moment when I had a ton of people watching me. Every morning the kids recite the Read Well alphabet chant and the second graders across the hall have been coming over to join in. In addition to two classes of children, I had the sub, the second grade teacher, three or four assistants, and another student teacher observing me lead this chant. I started off strong and then I suddenly became very aware of how many eyes were on me. My voice began to quiver and crack. It was strange how I couldn't stop it from happening. Mercifully, it ended fairly well and we moved on.

Then came the afternoon...ooooh baby was it rough. As I turned the kids loose to work on the math packets, I realized that some worksheets were missing for the next activity. After scouring the classroom from top to bottom, I had to wing it. I opted to do a fun read aloud and then tried to teach the kids how to play "fruit salad." I was basically filling time until the school counselor arrived to teach a social lesson. After about ten minutes, it was clear she wasn't going to show.

Even though I hadn't planned on teaching nutrition today, I happened to be prepared to do so...luckily. I taught a condensed version of the proteins food group. It was swift and sweet. Here's the kicker, just as I was getting materials ready to transition into the writing...the counselor arrived to teach her lesson. She saw me surprised look and said she always came at that time. We had just spoken at lunch and discussed the time so I was puzzled at who had made the mistake. Feeling frazzled from the hectic afternnon, I was actually grateful that she showed so that I could get some other pressing work done.

When the kids finally left for the day, I collapsed in a heap. My CT wanted me to write up a sub plan for him so when he returned he'd know what to do for the stuff that I'd been teaching recently. That felt a little odd to do. After finishing that, I hightailed to the sitter's to pick up my kids. Then we drove through rush hour traffic to the doctor's office for my son's appointment. Almost two hours later and with two very tired children, we finally went home. My hubby had dinner ready when we got there, for which I was eternally grateful for. I wanted to get some homework done also, but soon gave up on that notion. My brain was done thinking for the day.

I survived my first official stint as a real teacher. My CT is a real challenge at times for me to work under, but I do learn a lot from him. I am often second-guessing myself when I fail to do things just as he wants me to. However, he seemed to have enough confidence in me to turn over the reigns in a pinch, so that meant a lot. I still have to fight my insecurities and have more to learn, but I now know that I will make a good teacher. It will be a fight to the finish with school, but I truly force myself to keep my focus on the here and now. If I look to far ahead, it becomes too overwhelming. I like change to come in small doses.