Gonna turn it on!

Just for kicks, I spent some of my breaks between homework stints cruising youtube. I got a strange urge to watch some old clips from the 70's children's show, The Electric Company. "Hey you guys!!!" Did you know that Morgan Freeman and Rita Moreno got their starts on this show? I loved it as a kid! I've had the theme song stuck in my head ever since. It has become my "feel good" song when I need a little pick-me-up. No smirking, it's a surprisingly catchy tune. I dare you know to take a peek at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rox9Z5XwOEg and see if you can get it outta your head! But I digress...

Well, hello. Feels like I haven't blogged forever. In reality, it has only been about 5 days since my last post. I try to be consistent and blog once a day or at least every other day. However, I got swamped with a ton of coursework and lesson prep over the weekend. I had to revamp some lessons from my work sample, study a graphing unit for math, and lots of other goodies like that. The students had Monday off, so it was a catch up day. I spent hours filing, laminating, cutting, and color coding literacy centers. Aren't ya jealous? :)

I have to give myself a little pat on the shoulder for today. My CT was out for personal reasons and so there was a sub. I basically taught 80% of the day and did a pretty decent job, considering. I even taught my first math lesson...EVER! Those who know me can attest to my severe lack of mathematical skills, so this is a major feat for me. I'd worked with this sub on two previous occasions and she commented that I had vastly improved since we last met. That made me feel good. My confidence is slowly building as I feel more accustomed to the routine. I am teaching about 50% of the day right now, so in the coming weeks I will be taking over completely. Can we say BUSY?!!!

To end on a happy note, I am super happy with how my work sample is coming and am kinda feeling better about my action research coming together. That project will continue to be the bane of my existence until the end of the term. Tomorrow's nutrition lesson is a biggie as my supervisor is coming to observe again. I have the kids dissecting fruit. It will either be a big hit or a big mess. Maybe both? I am praying that it goes well. Wish me luck! In the meantime, I am gonna work on more homework tonight, watch some American Idol, and get a good night's sleep (that makes all the difference!).

Thursday Thirteen

Well, here goes my second attempt at this Thursday Thirteen stuff. I've been wanting to write a blog about some strange commercials that I've noticed lately and thought today would a good time to give it a go. They may be odd, but I still love 'em! So without further ado, here is my list for the day (in no particular order).

13 of the Strangest Commercials Ever Made

1. Carl's Jr. Milkshake: Two men shaking two dairy cows to the tune of "My milkshake is better than yours..." Pure genious.
2. Quiznos Sponge-Monkeys: Two wierd looking sponge monkeys (or whatever you wanna call 'em), with a top hat and pirate hat, strum a guitar as they sing why we should eat Quiznos subs. "They got a pepper bar!" I still laugh at this one. My son does a great imitation.
3. "Time to Fix the Doughnuts" Guy: I forget if this was for Winchell's or Dunkin' Donuts, but this one was timeless.
4. "Where's the Beef?": Unless you have been living under a rock or are too young to remember, this one is a classic. To be honest though, I can't even recall which burger chain this little old lady was stumping for. Wendy's I think.
5. "I'd like to buy the world a Coke!": To this day, whenever I hear the song "I'd like to teach the world to sing," I still sing the Coke lyrics. Harmony at its best.
6. Mentos: Any of these ads really. So kooky, but you still smile with a cock-eyed grin and scratch your head to see the correlation between the product and the point of the commercial. "Mentos...the freshmaker."
7. CGI Orville Redenbacher (sp?): Who knew that this old-timer would ever make a comeback from the grave wearing an iPod no less. Freaky is the only word I can think of.
8. "Excuse me, but do you have any Grey Poupon?": Nuff said.
9. Avoid the Noid! Dominos: The odd little red guy is just another pop icon now and made Domino's a household name.
10. Yo quiero Taco Bell!: The talking chihuahua (sp?) was adorable.
11. Bud. Wise. Er. Frogs: Funky and fun. Creative and corny. I loved it!
12. Spuds Mackenzie: Who knew a dog could be so popular with the ladies.
13. "Can you hear me now?": Who knows what cell phone this ad was hocking, but I still use that phrase whenever I get a dropped call. It's a part of the vernacular now I guess.

And there you have it. It's all I could think of this morning. Have a great day!

If at first you don't succeed...

Wow, what a day. The one thing that I did right was I actually went to bed a decent hour. Granted, I scrapped doing homework for personal reasons, but at least I was well-rested. That turned out to be a lifesaver. The morning was devoted to the highly scripted, very fast-paced reading program. We got a new student and so my Cooperating Teacher (CT) had me tutor him in several units to try to quickly catch him up to speed. I felt sorry for the kid and this huge volume of material was crammed into his head. I am not knocking the program per se, but I just couldn't believe the sheer volume he was expected to learn in a very short amount of time. Then it was off to a lengthy collaboration meeting about the reading program and students' progress.

About halfway through the meeting, I had to dash out and begin my work sample. I am teaching a nutrition unit and felt so out of sorts as I taught it. Thoughout the first half of the lesson I crashed and burned. Thankfully, the end went a little better. Just as I was finally hitting my stride, it was time to switch to writing. I am simultaneously teaching my work sample and my action research writing units back to back. There is a lot of preparation and aftermath that goes into these units. The time parameters make it a real challenge to fit everything in.

As I taught the writing lesson, I realized I didn't really have a clue how to teach it. I was ill-prepared and didn't have the right know-how to do it properly. In a nutshell, the kids weren't sure what to do with the information I taught them and it was another disaster. After school, I told my CT what had happened (he was still in the collaboration meeting and missed it). He told me to be very specific and clear in my expectations. I will be reteaching the lesson tomorrow to redeem myself. It adds more pressure, but hopefully they will get it this next time. The great thing about this process is that even though I screw up, I definitely learn what to do for the next go-around. Baby steps I guess. Who knew teaching would be so complicated? I have learned that the hard way. Week four is almost over, so I am grateful that time is a-flyin.

I am taffy

Wow. Let me just say that for the last few weeks I have felt what it must be like to be a piece of taffy being made. You know, when you go to the coast and want to eat some saltwater taffy. The stores have those windows where you can watch the taffy being stretched over and over on metal rollers until it is thin and stringy. Well, that is what balancing grad school, family, and the politics of teaching has been doing to me. This is my current life.

It is hard to please everyone and balance a schedule that works for everyone. If I am working hard to please one person, chances are pretty good that I am frustrating or irritating another. So as I roll from one stress-inducing week to another, I find myself getting stretched thinner and thinner. And yet that is the great thing about taffy...no matter how thin you stretch it, somehow it manages to stay in one piece. I'm still hanging on. I try to see it as my husband reminds me. The end is in sight and in will all be worth it.

Times...they are a' changing

Okay, I am not really an avid follower of politics, but some recent developments have caught my attention. Some of my polarizing comments may hit a nerve for some, but please remember that this is just a blog and a place me to scribble my ramblings. Nuff said about that. Although the next major election is still over a year or two away, the candidates are already heating up in the Democratic race. Historically, the presidency has been primarily pursued by older white males. We proclaim to be one of, if the most progressive country in the world and yet we seem to have issues with diversifying our leadership.

It will be fascinating to watch how the 2008 elections will play out. It has the potential to be the most amazing presidential races EVER. Hillary Rodham Clinton proclaims that "I'm in to win!" Barack Obama has now entered as a possible candidate as well. If either of these political forces were to run without the other in the race, each would fare well.

With them both in the same election however, each candidate will be making history and therefore creating an uphill battle for each. For at least the Democratic primaries, the votes will come down whether people want to elect the first ever African-American President OR the first ever female president. It would be a major coup for either person as well as the entire country. The frustrating thing is that only one will be left standing in the end to face the Republican candidate. It will be interesting to see who steps up to fill Bush's shoes on that side of the fence.

Strictly speaking for myself, I am torn over many of the current government policies. I respect Bush on one level for his maverick approach and pull-no-punches Texas charm. On another level I think that he has little insight into the true price some of his decisions have cost the people of this country and abroad. After 9/11, he recited repeatedly how the war on terror would be a lengthy and costly campaign. Feeling patriotic, the country backed him without question. However, I don't think anyone pictured it turning out quite this way. Many worry that this war has become this generation's Vietnam. We are fighting an enemy we can't see.

At this stage, I don't know how I feel or who I would give my vote to. I have mixed feelings about Clinton. Sometimes I really respect her and other times I question her decisions. I know nothing about Obama, so I reserve judgement until I learn more about him and his ideas. I know that whoever wins, voting should be based on the best person for the job, not their gender or skin color. Yet its hard to ignore the obvious benefits and great strides that giving one of these candidates a shot at the White House could bring. After the last few years leadership, I welcome some positive changes...whatever they may be. Just some food for thought.

Thursday Thirteen

I just recently discovered what this Thursday Thirteen phenomenon is all about. After doing a little research on the topic, I thought I'd give it a go. And since this week was the season premiere of American Idol, I figure why not make my inaugural 13 all about the freakshow we call good TV and why I love it.

13 Things That I Love About American Idol:

1. Kelly, Ruben, Clay, Fantasia, Jennifer, Carrie, Bo, Taylor, and Chris. (that's almost it's own list, but there were too many names to include...and yes, I did purposely omit some obvious names).
2. The dysFUNtional judges
3. Seeing contestants get better each week
4. Getting to be a song critic
5. The bad auditions (some just want their 15 minutes, but some are truly delusional)
6. Guessing what genre will happen each week
7. Seeing which song the top 12 will attempt
8. Picking a favorite early on and following them to the end (can we say Carrie?)
9. The physical transformations (i.e. Clay)
10. That moment when you know a contestant has really nailed their song
11. Ryan Seacrest (hey, I like the guy)
12. Looking forward to the January premiere and the May finale
13. Chatting with my mom by phone each week to critique the performances

Now, 13 Things That I Loathe About American Idol:

1. Ryan Seacrest's former catchphrase..."Seacrest, out!"
2. Ryan Seacrest's current catchphrase..."After the break!"
3. Making sure I do my part in keeping my favorites in the running by having to text my vote in, otherwise I feel bad when they get voted off.
4. Too many bad auditions are shown
5. Not enough good auditions are shown
6. William Hung
7. The cheesy DAWGpound
8. Annoying contestants that sing well, but have horrible interview skills (i.e. too cocky, try to be funny but aren't)
9. Websites that run campaigns to keep underdog contestants just to screw with the chances of those that truly have a shot (Can we say Scott from season 4? or the goofy kid from season 5?)
10. Corny product placement ads by the final 12 (i.e. Ford)
11. Fake comments like "we are like a big family"
12. The age limit should be raised to 18. The judging process can be pretty harsh for a teen.
13. What Simon says...depends on the day

It's snow joke!

Has the Day After Tomorrow officially arrived? It seems so, or at least in some form. After watching news reports for the past couple of days, it appears that most of the country has been blanketed in snow and ice. Some places have been hit harder than others, but in some areas it is just short of a freak of nature. The fact that cities like L.A. are getting covered in snow is just incredible. From the Pacific coastline to the Eastern seaboard and from the Canadian border to the tip of Texas, we are seeing mother nature in all winter in all her winter glory.

I bet climatologists are really eyeing the warning signs that our Mother Earth is beginning to grow tired of all of our shenanigans and is fighting back in her own way. We have been experiencing some strange weather patterns and devastating natural disasters in the last few years that should be getting people to pay closer attention. I truly believe it is all connected.

We have seen school closures happening all week. Even as I type this, I don't know what tomorrow has in store. I am sort of crossing my fingers for a another day off, but I have mixed feelings about it. We played in the snow yesterday for a couple of hours, but the novelty wore off today. I know, I am no fun. It was pretty cold out and so the kids and I stayed inside. Good news is, I got lots of homework done for a change.

Frosty Joe

Went to bed last night without any notion of what the morning would bring. When we woke up, there was four inches of snow on the ground and schools were closed. Got the kids up and fed 'em breakfast, and then we went out to play in it. They wanted to build a snowman, so we got busy gathering up all the snow that we could. Eventually, the neighbor boys came out and joined in on the fun. After an hour of packing snow into the snowman, we gave him a face. He got two barkchips for eyes, a carrot for a nose, tinker toys for arms, but we couldn't figure out how to give him a mouth. The kids named him Frosty Joe.

They eventually grew bored of that, so they made snow angels and threw snowballs at each other. We rarely get this kind of snowfall, so they had a grand 'ol time. Surprisingly, it hasn't melted away yet. We are crossing our fingers that it will stick around for another day. Too bad we didn't have our sled handy. We left it a my parent's home as it snows there all the time and the kids more use out of it there. There were some children from around the neighborhood trekking through the street with their sleds. If the kids had gone to school, they probably would've just stared out the window all day.

After a couple of hours, we called it a day and came inside to get warm. I made some hot cocoa for my kids. They resembled Rudolph with their cherry cheeks and nose. The water got a little hot, so they opted to use straws. I couldn't believe how fast they drank it up. The only thing missing today was a crackling fireplace to make the house seem all cozy. I am hopeful that our next home will have fun. Happy snow day to everyone!

Woohoo!

Plop, plop, fizz, fizz...oh what a relief it is! What I am trying to say is that my daughter finally went potty in the toilet tonight. This registers very high on the parental richter scale of achievements. We gave her lots of praise and her first star on her potty chart. As an incentive, she'll receive a Strawberry Shortcake character doll for every row she completes on her chart. When she eventually goes more frequently, she will have to complete more rows. For the last couple of weeks, she has been holding onto the package of Frosty Puff in hopes that she'll earn it soon. Tonight was the first time she seemed to connect the dots of what she needs to do to earn her rewards...her doll and her ticket to preschool. Here's hoping that she keeps up the good work!

Close Encounters

Have you ever thought about the famous people that you've seen or met over the course of your life? Well, in the midst of my attempt to shake off the stress of grad school and student teaching, I began to ponder this question. Just for fun and because I have insomnia, here are the people that have crossed my path or at least my eyeline at some point in my life. They are listed in no particular order.

• Henry Winkler - He was the first celebrity sighting that I can recall. He was signing autographs at Disneyland and was still playing"The Fonz."


• Joan Mondale - In 5th grade, my teacher was invited to interview the potential first lady during the '84 presidential race. All of the 5th grade classes were allowed to attend the big campaign appearance. I actually got her autograph.


• Keri Russell and Scott Speedman - My hubby and I were leaving our La Maze class and saw them walking out of a cafe in a little trendy shopping district. I wanted to stop so bad as I was a huge Felicity fan, but we opted to give them their privacy.


• Jared Rushton - He was hot off of Big and Overboard when he came to my high school. I was seated near him in English class and was a bit starstruck. Although I can't remember exactly what I said, I do remember that I stuck my foot in my mouth and that was that.


• Figure skaters galore - Courtesy of Stars on Ice and Tour of World and Olympic Figure Skating Champions, I saw Tai Babylonia & Randy Gardner, Michelle Kwan, Scott Hamilton, Tonya Harding, Kristi Yamaguchi, Nancy Kerrigan, Brian Boitano, Ekaterina Gordeeva & Sergei Grinkov, Herbie & Fred (you gotta know skating for that one), Rosalyn Sumners, Katerina Witt, Todd Eldridge, The Duschenays (sp?), Tara Lipinsky, and a host of others.


• Jose Canseco and Ricky Henderson - At a Mariners vs. A's baseball game at the Kingdome many moons ago.


• Cal Ripkin, Jr. and Kirby Puckett - At a Baltimore Orioles game (forget who played for who) in the 90's at some point when I was visiting my big brother.


• Shannon Miller and the other Mag 7 - At an exhibition event after the '96 Olympic Games with my best friend, Shelley.


• Concerts - Def Leppard (2x), Bryan Adams, Fleetwood Mac, Stevie Nicks (solo), Depeche Mode, Martina McBride, Olivia Newton-John, Clay Walker, Diamond Rio, and Sawyer Brown.

On the flip side of this, here is a random list of people I'd love to still meet one day for various reasons:

• Midori Ito (my all-time skating idol)


• Nadia Comaneci (my all-time gymnastics idol)


• Maya Angelou (poet extraordinaire)


• Jodi Picoult (fantastic writer)


• Angelina Jolie (everything about her)


• Sean Astin (love his work and his book)


• Viggo Mortensen (yum)


• Matthew McConaughey (yummy)


• Will Smith (yummy and funny)


• Rick Springfield (just cuz I loved him as a kid)


• Matthew Perry (just cuz I love him)


• Courtney Cox (sometimes I am soooo Monica)


• Loretta Lynn (childhood hero)


• Michael J. Fox (cute, funny, and a hero)

Okay, this is the kind of ramblings you get at 2:45am. The more profound insights come around 10pm. Since there is no school tomorrow, I don't have to get up early. However, my children will probably be up at the crack of dawn, so I better try and count a least a few sheep.

Kids are teachers too

Freedom of speech. It's a truly beautiful thing. In honor of MLK, Jr.'s upcoming birthday, we celebrated with a little party and learned some things about his legacy in class today. The kids were pretty interested and asked lots of questions. My Cooperating Teacher taught class this afternoon as I just observed or chimed in as needed. However, I got to read aloud a story the other day called, My Brother Martin. It was written by MLK, Jr.'s sister and details their childhood and the events that led him to have his "dream." I wasn't quite prepared for some of the comments and questions I got from the kids.

Now keep in mind, these are first graders. As I am reading, there is a picture of the King children gathered on the floor and listening to their grandmother tell them stories. One little boy, I'll call him Lucas, asked why all the people were dirty. It took a second to click that he was talking about the color of their skin. I gently explained that it wasn't dirt and that it was just the color of their skin. This class of first graders consists of predominantly Hispanic/Latino children, with a just a handful of Caucasian and maybe one Asian mixed in. There was a little African-American boy from the class next door that was listening to the story. When I came to the part in the story that used the word, "negro," this little boy asked me what the word meant.

Again, I carefully explained that it was not a nice word to use, but had been used many years ago to describe people with black skin. What really struck me about this moment was that in a room full of other races, this little black boy was the one to ask THE question. This was a new word to him and I felt so uncomfortable having to be the one to explain it to him. I approached the situation as I would have if he had been my own child. I tried to think about what I would want my son's teacher to say to him about racial issues. I tried to be very honest, but in a child-friendly and tactful way. Needless to say, it was the most profound read aloud experience I've had to date and I learned a great deal from the kids. They see that they look different from one another, but it's not something that bothers them. It is the adults who plant the seeds of love or hate.

Breathe and reboot...

Rest, it does a body good. As much as my conscience is nagging at me, I opted not to do any homework tonight. I can feel a case of the sniffles creeping up on me and I am gonna need to stay healthy if I wanna make it through the next month. I found out that I need to speed up for Action Research stuff, so that means more to do. However, I need to see my kids and just not think once in awhile. Tonight I just vegged pretty much, surfed the net, and caught a little TV. My brain is still feeling a bit foggy, but I blame that on the cold that I've caught. Tonight I plan to get more than a meager 5 hours of sleep...I aiming for 7! There is a lot to be said for self-care. Many people take their health for granted and then later burn out when the daily grind finally catches up with them. I think we've all been there at some point on some level. I love to quote, so here is one from Miss Carrie Bradshaw of Sex in the City when her laptop and her life crashed..."Sometimes you just need to breathe and reboot."

"Prophet"-ic Words

After viewing a recent episode of Numbers that focused on a criminal cult leader, I posted a blog about Rajneeshpuram entitled, "Non-Prophet." This particular cult, or commune if you prefer, was located an only an hour or so from where I grew up. Well, someone left a lengthy comment for me in regards to my misperceptions of the Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh (now known as Osho I believe and also the name of the blogger who left the comments). This person also stated that I should have taken the time to understand this religious sect and not be misled by mean-spirited propaganda. Since I cannot locate the blog of this person, I shall leave my response to their comments here in hopes that they see it.

First and foremost, I couldn't visit this cult back in the early 80's because I was in elementary school. I can't imagine my parents driving us out there to see such a thing. My parents raised us to think for ourselves and pursue faith on our own terms, whatever that would come to mean. I have studied many cults over the years as a college student (religious studies courses) as on my own as simply a topic of interest. I draw my own conclusions, not what the mass media feeds to me. I try to read factual information from a variety of sources to get a balanced perspective. While you make some valid points in your comments, I just do not see the point of giving oneself over completely to a mortal being. I believe in a higher power that can be seen, but only felt from within by having faith that something greater is out there and watching over us.

If someone wants to give up their material wealth for the benefit of someone who claims to be a messiah of some sort, that is their prerogative. It's just not my style. If someone knocks on my door to try and convert me to their faith, I politely decline. I will listen with an open mind and heart, but I will still choose to believe what feels right to me. I am sure the same holds true for the members of the Rajneesh sect. I know that there are still members from all over the globe that find this particular faith to be very profound. That is their right and their choice. I blog about whatever is my mind on any given day. That is my right and my choice. There are so many wonderful religions out there and that is the beauty of it. May the freedom to choose always be with us. Best wishes to you Osho, and thank you for your comments.

Swirling in a whirlpool

Today was one of those days when I should have just ignored the alarm clock and gone back to sleep. Let me backtrack just a little bit first. For those that don't know, I am in the fifth and final term of a masters program. There are just not enough hours in the day to get everything done, so I have to follow a very strict schedule to keep my head above water or risk sinking.

I swear that my head hit the pillow and suddenly my husband was telling me it was to wake up. I s00000 didn't want to get out of bed. It felt so warm and cozy. They had expected school closures due to snow, but no such luck. While it snowed later in the day, none reallly stuck to the ground. So much for sleeping in, eh? It was wishful thinking on my part I guess. Anyway, I dragged myself outta bed and struggled to find something to wear. Then I spent several minutes trying to print out my paper, but to no avail. Something wasn't connecting right, so I gave up. Then I literally forgot to eat breakfast. Anyone who knows me can tell you that is not something I do. Breakfast is the one meal I never skip. Luckily, I had remembered to pack a lunch, so I grabbed a cheese stick to tide me over. When I got to school (late), I went to the staff lunchroom and found someone had put out hot cocoa for everyone. Now that is God watching over us. It was just what I needed to get myself going.

So I made it through the day and rushed home to print try and print out that paper. Luckily, it worked this time. I grabbed a bowl of cereal for a quick dinner and was out the door to get to my first class of the term. Before class, I spoke with someone in the office about my finanical aid and got some unsettling news. The amount of my load disbursement was considerably less than I had been originally told it would be. As you can probably guess, I became a bit stressed about how that will affect our budget for the next four to five months. Class went by pretty fast. We went over the syllabus and I learned that I will have even more things to add to my to do list before I can graduate. I was did meet with my prof and got some great feedback about some things.

Now I am home and feel like I am coasting in on fumes. I feel like I am letting the pressure get to me. I do better some days and not so much on others. Today wasn't a fun day, but I know I will find a way to balance everything in time. As someone was never really raised with much religion, I cannot claim to know the Bible very well. Even though my faith may be in the fledgeling stages, I feel that it is strong enough to know that God never gives us more than we can handle. I want to believe that I can do all of this, but right now I feel stretched to the limit. Tonight I wanted to cry and just walk away from school. However, I realized that I must see this through and will be so grateful when all is said and done. Thank God that my husband has been so understanding of the sheer volume of time that I need to devote to my homework and time away from the family. I know that this has been hard on him and the kids as well. My son is really struggling to understand why I have to be gone all the time or working on stuff. Breaks my heart a little more each day.

I think the best analogy to sum up this whole thing that I am going through is to think of Mickey Mouse. If you have ever seen the movie, Fantasia, you might remember the scene where Mickey plays a sorcerer's apprentice. He secretly tries on the wizard's hat and makes the brooms do all the clean up work. Next, the broom splits into several and dump bucket after bucket of water. Soon things get out of hand and suddenly Mickey is swirling in a whirlpool. Mickey is nearly drowning, until the wizard restores order amidst the chaos. I feel exactly like Mickey.

What I get to feeling like this, I need to remind myself of is how lucky I am. I have a loving family, wonderful and supportive friends, a place to call home, and a fulfilling career path. These are only riches one ever really needs in this life. Maybe I should just quit my bitching and take what comes because it is what it is. However, that's why I write so often these days on this blog. It's a good place to vent.

Happily ever after?

One of Princess Diana's parting gifts in this life was her eldest son, Prince William, or Wills as the British press has affectionately called him since birth. He has proven to be a responsible, hard-working young man with a lot of class. While his younger brother, Harry, has found himself in a few scrapes over the years, Wills has managed to keep his nose out of trouble. It may be due in large part to his relationship with his college sweetheart, Kate Middleton. While it is wonderful to be young and in love, he has wisely paced this romance just right. He has so much living yet to do and to marry now would set him on a course for of royal duty that could lead to challenges he may not be ready for. However, it would be amazing to see these two tie the knot sometime down the road. Hopefully, they will continue to grow even closer over time and not drift apart with time. They have the weight of the world on their shoulders as expectations heat up with every passing year.

When Prince Charles and Lady Diana Spencer wed in a ceremony broadcast around the world, it was quite the spectacle. Full of pomp and circumstance, it was every little girl's dream come true to watch this hopeful young woman marry the man of her dreams. Even though I was quite little, I remember it quite vividly. My very first paper dolls were actually a very elaborate set of the couple. It cost some $7 and I had to save several weeks worth of my allowance to buy it. That is a steep price by even today's standards. While I realize that the fairy tale had an unhappy ending for Charles and Diana, it doesn't have to be that way for Wills and Kate. I for one believe in the possibility of happily ever after. We shall see.

Look at me, I'm Sandra Dee!

Okay, I've just spent some ten hours typing up several pages of my work sample. To break up the monotony of the evening, I sprinkled in moments of watching the new reality show on NBC called Grease: You're the One that I Want. Yes, I realize that it is a complete ripoff of American Idol, but with a twist. However, it was actually a fun show to watch.

If you are even a little bit of a fan of the movie version, you will love this show. One of the judges actually wrote the original script and conceived the characters based on his personal experiences. So that gives the show an air of credibility right there. The female judge has Broadway choreography credentials, and I am not sure who the British Simon knockoff judge is, but you don't pay him too much mind. It's just kinda fun watching these Rydell High wannabes try to be Danny and Sandy.

I am not sure how it will all play out exactly, but I know they are picking several hopefuls to go to Grease Academy. Again, they reference the Idol-style Hollywood bootcamp where they whittle down the final contenders. Olivia Newton-John even chimed in with a few random comments throughout the show. Overall, I think it was good enough to make me want to tune in again next week to see who makes the cut. I am a huge fan of this musical, so I like the concept of helpin pick the cast of the show. Hey, the real Idol starts in just a couple of weeks anyway!

Dreams can come true...

Okay, I am sensing a strange pattern beginning to form. We all wish for our dreams to come true...but not the bad ones. Last night I had another worrisome dream. This time it was my son I couldn't find. We were with family and a bunch of other random people from my past (dreams always do that for some reason). We went swimming and so my son went with his grandpa to get ready. Well, when I come out of the locker room area, I notice Nicky isn't around. This whole thing is a bit hazy, so bear with me.

Then when my dad agrees to bring him to the door of the locker room, I tell them I'll meet them both there. Then when I get there, nobody is around. I go back out to the swimming area and my dad is happily swimming with the others in our group. I question him as to where my son is and he says he left him by the locker room door. I tell him that he wasn't there. So begins my frantic and frenzied search. All those memories of my son's first diappearance come bubbling to the surface. I am referencing the day when my son's bus driver dropped him off and his babysitter arrived too late to pick him up. So my son went wandering around until our neighbor realized he had no one to watch him and took him in for a couple of hours. Can we say scary day?

Anyway, I had become almost incosolable until my son turned up in another area of the pool. He had been happily occupied by playing with a cousin or someone. The dream was a bit disjointed, but I just remember that I had that awful feeling you get when you don't know where your child is. Two dreams in a row about a similar theme. No expert in the field of dream analysis is needed to tell me that it isn't just a coincidence. I just wish I knew what to make of them both. If nothing else, it makes me want to cherish my time with my kids more and be very mindful of where they are at all times. People thought I was overreacting in my dream, but I don't care...we're talking about my children's well-being here.

I put a lot of stock into dreams. I've had many premonitions over my lifetime that have come true in some form or another. I don't proclaim to be clairvoyant or anything, but some of my dreams have become a reality. Most of the time, whenever I have a dream of any significance...it usually involves myself or someone close to me going through something major. Then if it comes true, it an event that happens to someone else. So anyone I know that is reading this blog, keep your loved ones close and be aware of those in your life that have children. I don't want to be a drag to anyone, but I also don't want to ignore the message of these dreams.

Without a trace...

I'm a big fan of the show, Without a Trace. I really get immersed in the storylines and drama of a it all. However, last night I had a very real dream that resembled this show just a little too close for comfort. In this dream, I was shopping at a nearby Winco with my two children. Though parts of it are a little fuzzy to me now, I remember chasing down some woman who had almost hurt someone or us or whomever. I must've left my kids supposedly by my car with intructions to wait for me right there. That was my first mistake.

After catching up with the woman I'd been running after, she acted very contrite for whatever it was she had done. She kept talking to me as if to distract me. When I finally realized I had better get back to my kids, I only saw my son standing by the car. I asked him where his sister was and he said he didn't know. Together we began to search the entire area. The Winco turned into some quaint downtown district. My son and I kept going into shop after shop, asking people if they'd seen my daughter. The police were called and I gave them my daughter's most recent picture so that they could get the word out about her missing. They felt that someone had taken her. My son was in a daze.

The awful thing is that I woke up before I could find her. It was the most horrible feeling to know that my baby girl was missing and most likely kidnapped. And worse of all it was my own fault for not keeping a better eye on my kids. It makes me think back to those times when I truly turned my back for all of a second to do grab something off of a shelf or pay for something. It only takes a second for someone to come along and scoop up your child.

You just never know what can happen, so I am so grateful that I happened to have that recent picture of her (in the dream). I pretty much always have my wallet photo album of the kids with me. It's pretty small and doesn't take up much room. What a saving grace it could turn out to be if such a situation were to really happen. You can never be too careful. I don't wish to lead a life fearing what could happen, but I think it doesn't hurt to be aware and cautious. My kids mean everything to me and I don't know how I could handle it if such a thing ever became a reality. I pray that it never does.

Non-Prophet

Wow. I had every intention of getting on the computer tonight and either doing some homework or just playing around. Well, I got on the phone with my best friend and next thing I knew a couple of hours had passed. I guess that's what happens when you get lost in conversation, you become oblivious to just about everything else.

My son even curled up next to me and fell asleep with his head on my lap. I carried him to bed, and he's getting big enough that I won't be able do that much longer. My baby boy is not so much a baby anymore. Tonight we read a book together and it was so awesome to hear him actually pronounce several words all on his own, some of them were pretty big too. I was very impressed.

On another. completely opposite train of thought, I took a short break from this particular blog entry to watch some of the show Numbers. It was a very intense episode. We've all heard of cults with crazy prophets. Think Branch Davidian, Jonestown, Rajneesh, and Heaven's Gate. This cult was about a twisted, self-proclaimed prophet that was creating a strange family tree to cover up for some genetic inadequacy of his own. I didn't catch the whole episode, so I missed a vital piece of that puzzle.

However, this guy raped and impregnated several young girls over many years. Then as his offspring came of age, he did the same to them. He was violet with anyone who attempted to leave his cult. Those too fearful to leave were ultimately sacrificed. In a Waco-like standoff, the prophet killed his followers by causing his compound to explode, unbenknownst to them until it was too late. It was really disturbing.

I swear, I am always fascinated by the people that buy into these nutty cults and what makes them give themselves over so completely. Some choose to willingly sacrifice themselves for their faith, while others get in too deep and are unable to get out alive even when they want to. It is a dangerous ploy to fall for. I grew only about an hour away from the Rajneeshpuram site. I still remember the haunting images of all those people wearing orange, pink. amd red. They almost took over an entire town, but failed in the end. They sort of imploded from within once the Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh went down. I guess I just have trouble wrapping my mind around the psychology of it all. Scary stuff.

I think this entry gives new meaning to the term...random thoughts.

Back to School

Well, I have almost survived the first week of my second stint of student teaching. I have been crazy busy for the last few days. Just burning the candle at both ends I guess. In my last placement I had the luxury of just mainly observing for the first week or two, even though it was a short-term placement. Well, my CT (Cooperating Teacher) has the notion of throwing me to the wolves, so to speak. He feels that I'll get bored just watching him, so he has already been putting me to work. Starting Monday, I take over teaching a couple of things. I am grateful for his confidence in me, but just feeling a little ill-prepared to teach stuff I have no experience with. Let's just say, I am learning to think on my feet. My CT reassures me that doing is the best of learning, so I am just praying each night that I can get through each day and do a good job. Time will tell.

In one of the nuttiest moves I've ever made, I will begin my teaching my second WS (Work Sample) the same week as my AR (Action Research) project. For those that don't know what those two things are, let me briefly explain so you can get the full scope of this. A WS is a unit consisting of at least 10 lessons. In addition, you must complile a complete analysis of the school, your students, your own evolution as a teacher, and a full assessment student achievement of the unit objective. My last one was 116 pages long!

An AR is very similar to a thesis. I ask a question and then conduct field research on it by collecting and triangulating data. Then I report on my findings. There is much more to both, but that is both in a nutshell. Due to time constraints and some other extenuating circumstances, it was unavoidable. It might be academic suicide on some level, but the only thing I can do is push through and cross my fingers that the stars align for me. I've been doing a little bit each night, but the pace finally caught up with me, so I had to take a brain break this evening.

In the short time I've known them, I must add that I am really enjoying these first graders. They are so adorable and willing to learn. Kids at this age are still very much like sponges. All students are unique and wonderful in their own ways, but this group of children are extra special in that they have seen and lived through some major challenges in their young lives. This school has the highest poverty rate in the county and has many kids that come from very troubled homes. I met many of my students previously at a local Boys & Girls club that I volunteered at for awhile. It is heart-breaking and uplifting all at once to work with these children. I adore their energy and personalities. They love to shine, so I hope that when all is said and done, I get to help them experience that. I know I'll take away some amazing memories from this school.

Ready or not, here we go!

Alright, I will finally adhere to common sense and turn in early. Believe it or not, 11:00pm is early for me. I have spent the past three weeks of my winter vacation staying up LATE. It started out as just til midnight so that I could catch Sex in the City. Then it got later and later and I got online or hooked on some show on E! (we don't get too many channels). I became a little addicted to Girls Next Door and Dr. 90210. One really crazy night I got into watching stuff on www.youtube.com and stayed up until almost 4am. Yes I know, I am sad. I swear, I would have the TV for company (everyone else was in dreamland) and I would be online. When you're online time flies faster than you can imagine. An hour feels like a just a few minutes.

However, I finally accomplished many goals over the last two days. I was able to get many long overdue tasks completed. I guess I procrastinated until the last minute of my vacation, but at least several items are now off my list of things to do. Had to make room for new things. Like tonight, I had a lot notebooks and school-related materials to organize and prepare for tomorrow. I start my second and final student teaching placement, so I wanted to feel ready and not rushed. I will be working with a first grade class and they will keep me on my toes for sure.

Amazingly enough, I even got lunches made for my son and I so that I don't have to deal with it in the morning. My workbag and my son's backpack is all set as well. I just hope that I can keep up on this preparedness for the next four months. I know me, there will be days when it just won't happen, but I can give it my all. My biggest fear is falling behind on my coursework. There is no room for error at this point, so I am definitely feeling the pressure. However, I am trying to go into this next experience with a positive outlook and remember to breathe. I tell myself that as long as I do my part, all the pieces will fall into place. Time to get to bed if I wanna avoid the dark circles under my eyes. Here's to a new year, a good attitude, and bright beginnings for us all!